Prompted

God versus the scorpion

"You know, I've always felt there was something creepy about you," God said to the scorpion.
"I suppose you could say there was something creepy ABOUT me, but let me tell you, I am not creepy," replied the scorpion.
"Excuse me?"
"There is creepiness about me, but I am not creepiness, itself."
"Right. Those are spiders," God intoned, with an air of finality.
"No, spiders aren't creepy, either," objected the scorpion.
"Sure they are. They have a million little creepy eyes, and little creepy appendages on their creepy mouths, and they crawl around on eight hairy legs, and bite you, and spread disease and stuff."
"No, that's creepiness, not the spider."
"Okay," tried God again, "spiders are animals that have lots of eyes, and arms on their mouths, and eight legs with hair on them, and they can bite, and sometimes spread disease."
"Right. That's a spider," the scorpion offered, encouragingly.
"But not creepiness," God's voice fell.
"Well there's creepiness, and spiders, and spiders, and creepiness."
"And the difference is...?"
"Exactly."
"Why are you always trying to cop out on me?" God whined.
"I'm so not," the scorpion said, disinterestedly.
God pouted. "All I said was I've always thought there was something creepy about you. I didn't mean for you to take it personally. I was really only just trying to have a conversation."
"Well, let's have one then."
"Okay."
There was a silence.
"Did you know that scorpions are arachnids, just like spiders?" tried the scorpion.
"Really?" God yawned.
"Yes. Arachnids make up the largest group of Cheliceriforms, which are arthropods that have chelicerae, appendages that serve either as pincers or fangs. We also have pedipalps, which are those arms near our mouths that you mentioned, that help us feel for our prey before we crush it, or inject it with poison, or whatever the case may be."
"Poison?"
"Yes. For spiders, it softens the prey before they suck it up into their mouths."
"Oooo... creepy. Disgusting."
"No, that's not what I'm talking about."
"Well, what are you talking about then?"
"Come here, and I'll show you."
Got approached the scorpion.
"Bend down so I can whisper it to you."
God bent down. The scorpion felt for his face with her downy pedipalps. When she felt sure of the location of his neck, she grasped it securely with her pincer, expertly crushing it at the same time that she swung her strong tail forward and downward into his face, injecting poison into it. God went limp. The scorpion then delicately ate his head off the rest of his body. After that, she went home to retrieve her children, whom she felt particularly sure would enjoy his testicles.